A letter from the Boss
To All My Valued Employees,
There have been some rumblings around the office about the future of this company, and more specifically, your job. As you know, the economy has changed for the worse and presents many challenges. However, the good news is this: The economy doesn’t pose a threat to your job. What does threaten your job however, is the changing political landscape in this country.
However, let me tell you some little tidbits of fact which might help you decide what is in your best interests.
First, while it is easy to spew rhetoric that casts employers againstemployees, you have to understand that for every business owner there is a back story. This back story is often neglected and overshadowed by what you see and hear. Sure, you see me park my Mercedes outside. You’ve seen my big home at last year at a Christmas party. I’m sure; all these flashy icons of luxury conjure up some idealized thoughts about my life.
However, what you don’t see is the back story.
I started this company 28 years ago. At that time, I lived in a 300 square foot studio apartment for 3 years. My entire living apartment was converted into an office so I could put forth 100% effort into building a company, which by the way, would eventually employ you.
My diet consisted of Ramen Pride noodles because every dollar I spent went back into this company. I drove a rusty Toyota Corolla with a defective transmission. I didn’t have time to date. Often times, I stayed home on weekends, while my friends went out drinking and partying. In fact, I was married to my business — hard work, discipline, and sacrifice.
Meanwhile, my friends got jobs. They worked 40 hours a week and made a modest $50K a year and spent every dime they earned. They drove flashy cars and lived in expensive homes and wore fancy designer clothes. Instead of hitting the Nordstrom’s for the latest hot fashion item, I was trolling through the discount store extracting any clothing item that didn’t look like it was birthed in the 70’s. My friends refinanced their mortgages and lived a life of luxury. I, however, did not. I put my time, my money, and my life into a business with a vision that eventually, some day, I too, will be20able to afford these luxuries my friends supposedly had.
So, while you physically arrive at the office at 9am, mentally check in at about noon, and then leave at 5pm, I don’t. There is no “off” button for me. When you leave the office, you are done and you have a weekend all to yourself. I unfortunately do not have the freedom. I eat, and breathe this company every minute of the day. There is no rest. There is no weekend. There is no happy hour. Every day this business is attached to my hip like a 1 year old special-needs child. You, of course, only see the fruits of that garden — the nice house, the Mercedes, the vacations… you never realize the back story and the sacrifices I’ve made.
Now, the economy is falling apart and I, the guy that made all the right decisions and saved his money, have to bail-out all the people who didn’t. The people that overspent their paychecks suddenly feel entitled to the same luxuries that I earned and sacrificed a decade of my life for.
Yes, business ownership has is benefits but the price I’ve paid is steep and not without wounds.
Unfortunately, the cost of running this business, and employing you, is starting to eclipse the threshold of marginal benefit and let me tell you why:
I am being taxed to death and the government thinks I don’t pay enough. I have state taxes. Federal taxes. Property taxes. Sales and use taxes. Payroll taxes. Workers compensation taxes. Unemployment taxes. Taxes on taxes. I have to hire a tax man to manage all these taxes and then guess what? I have to pay taxes for employing him. Government mandates and regulations and all the accounting that goes with it, now occupy most of my time. On Oct 15th, I wrote a check to the US Treasury for $288,000 for quarterly taxes. You know what my “stimulus” check was? Zero. Nada. Zilch.
The question I have is this: Who is stimulating the economy? Me, the guy who has provided 14 people good paying jobs and serves over 2,200,000 people per year with a flourishing business? Or, the single mother sitting at home pregnant with her fourth child waiting for her next welfare check? Obviously, government feels the latter is the economic stimulus of this country.
The fact is, if I deducted (Read: Stole) 50% of your paycheck you’d quit and you wouldn’t work here. I mean, why should you? That’s nuts. Who wants to get rewarded only 50% of their hard work? Well, I agree which is why your job is in jeopardy.
Here is what many of you don’t understand … to stimulate the economy you need to stimulate what runs the economy. Had suddenly government mandated to me that I didn’t need to pay taxes, guess what? Instead of depositing that $288,000 into the Washington black-hole, I would have spent it, hired more employees, and generated substantial economic growth. My employees would have enjoyed the wealth of that tax cut in the form of promotions and better salaries. But you can forget it now.
When you have a comatose man on the verge of death, you don’t defibrillate and shock his thumb thinking that will bring him back to life, do you? Or, do you defibrillate his heart? Business is at the heart of America and always has been. To restart it, you must stimulate it, not kill it. Suddenly, the power brokers in Washington believe the poor of America are the essential drivers of the American economic engine. Nothing could be further from the truth and this is the type of change you can believe in. So where am I going with all this?
It’s quite simple.
If any new taxes are levied on me, or my company, my reaction will be swift and simple. I fire you. I fire your co-workers. You can then plead with the government to pay for your mortgage, your SUV, and your child’s future. Frankly, it isn’t my problem anymore.
Then, I will close this company down, move to another country, and retire. You see, I’m done. I’m done with a country that penalizes the productive and gives to the unproductive. My motivation to work and to provide jobs will be destroyed, and with it, will be my citizenship.
So, if you lose your job, it won’t be at the hands of the economy; it will be at the hands of a political hurricane that swept through this country, steamrolled the constitution, and will have changed its landscape forever. If that happens, you can find me sitting on a beach, retired, and with no employees to worry about.
Signed, Your Boss
I wish I knew. A friend sent it to me in an email…
It was probably written by the same man who created a very special engine and refused to take credit for it.
Please help us John. We’ll do anything you say!
JG: Anything? And you’ll follow my guidance?
Yes! Implicitly!
JG: Ok, eliminate the income tax.
But how will we pay our government employees?
JG: Fire them.
This is a response from one of “The Boss’s” employees…
Dear Boss,
Your note proves what most of us have always said behind your back – you’re a greedy and self-centered bastard who is focused on things, not people, and you will doubtlessly die a lonely and bitter man. We will continue to pray for you around the coffee pot, even though you are now making us pay a quarter a cup.
Here are few other things to consider before you throw your fit, close the company and move to Argentina:
• We appreciate the vision, drive and creative spirit that created your company, and we feel fortunate to work here. There are actually even a few of us who look up to you as an example of a true leader.
• We respectfully suggest that you should be thankful for the local, state and federal laws which give small businesses like ours (ooops, sorry – yours) tax breaks and growth incentives. They make everything from our paychecks, insurance premiums, rent, utilities, toilet paper – even your Mercedes – a tax deduction for you.
• (Speaking of your Mercedes, how much of your personal lifestyle is actually paid for by the company? Country Club dues that are “business entertainment”? Your kids’ new laptops that are “business equipment”?)
• When American businesses people – which you are privileged to be – employee fellow Americans, it helps America. Because we the people are taxpayers too, so we fund schools, police departments, the military, libraries, old folks’ care and other things.
• A healthy infrastructure (bet you didn’t think that people who “don’t mentally check in before noon” would know such a big word!) promotes a healthier community, which makes more and more consumers. And although we’re not the Rockefeller you are, we believe that more consumers means more business for us – again, sorry, you.
• We can understand you loathing those pesky and perpetually-breeding welfare mothers. (Who doesn’t?!) But contrary to Rush’s current ranting points, a slightly higher tax rate for you does not mean Socialism. Given the mess we’re in, it’s a good business investment. If everything falls apart, you’re not going to have anybody to sell to.
All this to say thanks for the note. And if you really want to close up shop, one of us will undoubtedly start a similar business in its place. Know why? Because even with all of your bitching about what you’re afraid is going to be taken away from you, there is no better place on earth to live or work or build a life than the United States of America.
Dear Bob…
Thanks for the kind letter.
As to your points:
1) I will NOT give thanks to those myriad of laws. Very few of them protect me (and by proxy you) in our business dealings, and most of them create an artificial drag on OUR success.
As for those “tax deductions,” do you have any idea how much complying with all that paperwork costs US? (And by “us”, I include your friends who are looking for jobs, that I didn’t have the leftover income to reinvest in employees.)
2) Personal lifestyle attacks need to be leveled at people who really live that way, or do you assume that every small business owner rolls around on a pile of lucre like Scrooge McDuck?
3) Americans are GREAT hires, because they are dollar for dollar more productive. Except when they are not. If someone else supplies it cheaper and better, it’s a signal that we need to be in a different business.
(Every time you make a Buy American argument, substitute the name of a state for the name of a country. Sounds silly.)
4) A healthy infrastructure is like a healthy environment, healthy air, and healthy schools. All for them, but how do you prioritize? If there’s only a fixed amount to spend on each of those perfect pursuits, how to we allocate?
Now… who is setting the bar for “how healthy” for each of those things? Is it someone living within means, or is it someone spending OUR dollars without having to work for them?
5) Rush? They haven’t had an album out in a couple of years. The “Snakes and Arrows Live” DVD was pretty good.
The last thing Rush said about taxation and socialism was handled in “The Trees.” (and the Trees were all kept equal by hatchet, ax, and saw.)
That’s the great thing about America. IF I close a business for the wrong reasons, YOU can open one right back up.
Nothing’s stopping you. Go for it.
While you can…
Snakes & Arrows!!! Greatness. Thanks.
Bob
What’s the source on this? Yourself, your boss or someone else? I like it a lot, and give credit to who deserves it.